Zane said that he ‘has to believe’ Abigail is alive, but earlier, during dinner, he said he suspects something ‘sinister’ must have happened to her.
I suppose it’s possible for both things to be true. Not every horrible thing that happens to a person leads to death.
I’m pondering this in my cramped, mold-infested bathroom, while cleaning the puncture wound from the nail in the barn. Luckily, it’s not deep and I’m pretty sure I’m up to date on my tetanus shots.
I scrub at a spot of dried blood on my jeans, toss them over the shower rod, and pull on my favorite comfy sweatpants.
I should be tired, but I’m wound up from the discovery in the barn, the ferocity of the storm, and the hot guy waiting for me on the other side of the door.
I give my teeth a quick brush and spend a couple minutes freshening up before stepping out of the bathroom.
Zane is sitting on the futon staring at his phone. I sit next to him and see that he’s studying the photos of Abigail’s bicycle.
A loud clap of thunder gives me a jolt.
Zane puts his arm around me. “You okay?”
“Yeah. Fine.” I rest my head on his shoulder. “Tell me about her.”
“Abigail?”
“Who else?”
“You must think I’m crazy to still be thinking about her after all these years.”
I could assure him that I don’t think he’s crazy but that would be dishonest. “Well, are you?”
“I don’t know. Maybe.”
It’s not the answer I was expecting. “What did that girl do to you?”
Zane pulls away. “What do you mean by that?”
I’ve said the wrong thing. “She must have made quite an impression on you, is all. What did you think I meant?”
“Nothing. It sounded like…” he scrubs one hand over the light stubble on his jaw, and changes the subject. “Uncle David didn’t seem too surprised about the bike. I’m wondering if he already knew it was there.”
“I got the feeling he might be hiding something. Or maybe it’s just that I didn’t like the way he talked about Abigail.” Didn’t like the man one bit, actually.
“He doesn’t usually talk that way about women in mixed company, but then, JB didn’t either, not until the dementia kicked in.”
“Maybe David is coming down with it too.” I regret my word choice instantly.
“Dementia isn’t a cold.”
“Oh, I know. Trust me I know. It’s way worse than any virus. I didn’t know your grandpa before, but can you imagine how the old JB would feel if he knew what kind of nasty shit he says out loud?”
“I don’t have to imagine it. I know. He’d hate it. JB liked to be in control. I don’t just mean in control of other people, either. He needed to be in control of himself at all times. He cared about his reputation within the community.”
“Funny, I was under the impression people thought he was a bit of an ass, long before he got sick.”
“Well, sure, if they disagreed with his politics. JB never held back his opinions, but he always spoke calmly and rarely lost his temper.”
“Unlike David. You said sometimes he really loses it.”
“Yeah, but that’s from alcohol.” Zane appears thoughtful for a moment. “I don’t think he was all that drunk tonight. I think he acted the way he did because he didn’t want to answer any more questions about the past, or about the bicycle. He knew I’d leave if he started saying bad things about Abigail.”
Here I was thinking Zane left so abruptly out of respect for me–so I wouldn’t have to hear any more of David’s crude comments–but really, Zane left because he couldn’t stand to hear his uncle talking crap about Abigail.
Not you too Zane. David made it sound like all of the Carlaw boys/men had a thing for Abigail back then.
“It does seem likely that one or more of the Carlaw men is keeping secrets about Abigail.”
Zane nods. “The question is what do I do about it?”
“I got the idea you planned to report it. Have you changed your mind already?”
“No, but I can’t go to the sheriff. He’s my uncle, remember?”
I do remember. Sheriff Ward Carlaw is David’s brother and Rev’s dad, and Rev seemed guilty too. “I don’t imagine Ward going after his brother or his son.”
Zane lets out a little snort. “I’m not so sure he’d protect Rev.”
“Really? Why not?”
“They’re not exactly close. Rev went to juvie for what he did to Abigail’s boyfriend. He was only in for a year, but when he got out, he moved in with another one of my uncles, and never lived with his parents again.”
“Huh. That’s interesting. Maybe Ward thought his son did more than beat up Ty Ramsey. Maybe he knows Rev did something to Abigail and that’s what tore them apart.”
“I’ve thought of that. It does make sense. Ward wouldn’t have turned in his own son no matter what, but that doesn’t mean he’d forgive him if he thought he committed a horrible crime.”
“You’re saying he wouldn’t have turned in his son even if the crime was murder?”
“No, I don’t think he would. One thing JB drilled into his sons, and his grandsons, is that families protect each other, no matter what.”
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but it doesn’t seem like you took that lesson to heart. Not if you’re wanting to report the bicycle to the police.”
“I’ve never been part of the JB club. Maybe that’s because my last name is Brooks and not Carlaw.”
“You’re still his grandson.”
“Yeah, but it’s different.”
“How so?”
He hesitates, takes a deep breath. “JB had a whole different set of rules for his daughter than he did for his sons. If the boys got hurt he’d tell him to tough it out–but he was the opposite with his daughter. He treated my mom like she was a fragile flower. JB believed in physical discipline. If his sons messed up he’d take them out behind the woodshed and use the belt on their backsides. He even did this to his grandsons on occasion. But never my mom and never me.”
“I get that he treated Sherry differently because she’s female, and he’s uh, old fashioned to put it nicely, but why did he treat you differently too?”
“My dad wasn’t JB’s son, so in a sense he’ll always be an outsider. I think JB felt like he’d be overstepping boundaries if he disciplined me.”
“Interesting. Or messed up, depending on how you look at it.”
Zane smiles, but without humor. “All families are messed up in one way or another. I don’t think JB ever liked my dad–they’re too different–but he always showed him respect.”
“Because he has a male chromosome?”
“Exactly.”
“I like JB less all the time.”
“The funny thing is most women liked JB. He had a sort of charisma. He’d be charming, gallant even, in the way he treated women. He’d never hesitate to compliment their looks, or their cooking, that sort of thing.”
“He thought women belonged in the kitchen barefoot and pregnant?”
“That’s about it. It’s funny, I sometimes think the only rebellious thing my mom did in her whole life was marry a man with liberal views.”
“What did JB think about that?”
Zane shrugs. “Mostly he accepted my dad who is non-confrontational but not wishy-washy. He’ll state his beliefs and always do what he believes is right and I think JB grudgingly respected him for that.”
“And you’re like your dad that way? When it comes to doing the right thing, I mean.”
“It’s who I am and that’s why I can’t let this go. If someone in my family knows what happened to Abigail–or if they hurt her–then they need to pay for what they did.”
He says this with such conviction that it renders me silent.
“You don’t agree with me.” Zane says. “You said earlier that you’d protect a family member if they were in trouble.”
I did say this. What I didn’t tell him is that I was once the family member who needed protecting. If not for my older sister I might have been taken from my family, and thrown into juvie. While a part of me wants to tell Zane my story, another part of me knows it’s too soon. A confession like that now would surely kill any chance of a second date.
Zane’s phone rings. He picks it up, frowns. “It’s Uncle David.”
“That can’t be good.”
“No.” Zane takes a deep breath before answering. “Hello?”
The phone doesn’t need to be on speaker for me to hear David’s next words. “What the fuck did you do Zane?”
(If you’re enjoying the story please consider linking/sharing/re-stacking. Have a great day!)
I like how we got some info regarding JB’s motivations + psychological and the difference between how he treated his sons and his daughter